Gold Rate – Pain and blessing

 

The aspect of increase of Gold rate did not attract my attention until others pushed my head in that direction. ‘I should have got married before the budget’ my daughter cried one day. ‘Huh?’ I never knew she was in such a. ‘Any boy I know?’ I asked fearfully about the affair that parents are always last to know. I braced for the worst as she said, ‘No-one special. I just wanted to get married so that you would not have to increase your marriage budget for me in the department of ornaments.’ Stunned with the unexpected answer, it took longer to comprehend her concern for her Daddy’s financial situation. ‘Full 700% rise in the rate of 10 grams by an astronomical figure according to the papers’ she educated me. I took her remark lightly and said, ‘As I am likely to shed a tear as I hand you over to your husband, I will shed another for the cost of your ornaments. So don’t change your whole life for some price of gold and end up with the wrong man in the hurry.’ A father’s lecture finally entered the conversation with a sprinkling of humor.

‘How come we have fish for the second time in the week?’ I asked my wife. Because of the recession, we had reduced the frequency of our non-veg menu days in the house. ‘The fisherwoman said the cost of her fish will reduce as her family boat has got some other side business.’ I wondered what side business a fishing boat can have in the course of fishing. My puzzlement must have reflected on my face as she dug her elbows in me and whispered to ensure our children did not over hear, ‘Gold smuggling has started again.’ I almost smacked my head in an attempt to clear the rust of honesty that even stopped me from realizing such obvious. Now I was happy that there is at least some supplier who passes on the benefit of lowering of cost and does not revel in his super profits at the expense of exploited consumers like me. My mind wandered like the documentary of the history channel to the fifties and sixties when gold smuggling in India was rampant. Everybody in the costal industry made tax-free money and built bungalows with scores of rooms that would put a hotel to shame. When that stopped due to parity of prices (lowering of customs duty) the poor guys boats had to be filled with the voluminous washing machines and televisions. Not only were they difficult to carry on landing but they also did not make sufficient margin per cubic centimeter as gold bars did earlier. I can imagine these people to rejoice the advent of their ‘golden’ period.

On the way to the office, I bumped into my neighbor who was currently struggling in his artificial jewelry manufacturing business. He did not have his usual grumpy face but possessed a carefree demeanor to the extent that I concluded he must have lost his mental stability due to work stress. ‘What is the good news bhai?’ I kept myself normal. ‘Did you not hear, the BGL line is raised so my market had widened!’ I knew BPL stood for below poverty line but BGL foxed me. He explained, ‘BGL means Below Gold Line means those people who cannot afford real gold. So these people are my market. By raising the rate…’ I raised my hand, ‘I know the rest. Congratulations.’ I wished him. Now I could see the future clearly that the handful car parking for guests in our building will be encroached upon by his cars purchased out of the super profits.
I was now beginning to see an antithesis of how increase of gold rate actually creates wealth for the people in addition to the Government. I shook my head. All the rust in my head was making me think the scary logic that increase in gold rate was good for the people and the more they paid, the more they earned. Does liberalization create such a great difference? While people around me were celebrating the impact of increase in Gold price due to Customs Duty, I grew depressed as none of the drops of fountain of possible benefits would ever fall on me.

My company economist played the role of a counselor as he heard my story over a cuppa. He smiled as if I overlooked an obvious advantage. ‘You forgot the savings you will have due to price reduction of your fish’ he reminded me. I was one up on him. ‘You always told me to look at the net effect as you look as the net profit of our company. So, I calculated the excess money I will have to shell out for my daughter’s wedding jewelry and to compensate that by the savings in fish, it will take 145 years as per my calculation.’ His face fell as he searched for some argument in his mind to counter mine. Then as an instant flash he blurted, ‘You will play the critical role of catalyst of the economy. All the money you will be spending will circulate in the economy and that is what Lord Keynes had advocated.’ Wow now I felt like superman on whose shoulder’s rested future of world economy. I could visualize popular news channels like BBC, CNN, Times Now, Headlines Today etc. all clamoring to ask me how I saved the world. But in a flash I realized that my economist friend who was now heading for the elevators had pulled a real fast one on me.

 

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Renaming Copyright

 

 

 

I was  busy pouring over a management consultancy file when the door was opened and two safari clad muscle men stood in doorway announcing to me that their ‘Saheb’ was arriving. I looked up amused as no VIP comes to my small consulting firm. In the history of this firm one IP Trade union leader needed consulting where I was summoned to his office and made to wait to seek his audience. Saheb walked in with pomp breathing heavily either due to his overweight or anger which caused him to redden his face.

“What legal option can we have against the Trump fellow?” he wasted no time. I was puzzled as we dealt local corporate matter only. “You mean the President of USA?” I asked. He nodded. “What has he done to you that you want to sue him?” I asked fearfully. “He renamed Gulf of Mexico as Gulf of America’ thundered the Saheb. I was puzzled how a local party leader was affected by an action of renaming miles apart. “And you are suffering because…..” I asked expecting him to complete my sentence.

“Renaming is our monopoly” he thundered. “All British named roads of Mumbai were renamed by us. Transition from Bombay to Mumbai was by us. Airports to Flyovers even school like King George were all were renamed by us. The other party just named roads and institutions after their family members”. “ Did you want Gulf of Mexico to be named after a Peshwa King?” I was now daring to go sarcastic.

He shook his head. “Just like the press you misunderstand and misquote us. Renaming is the action our party does not like to be done by others. Tomorrow he will rename our landmarks like even the Taj Mahal will be named Trump Taj after his failed venture.” “Why will Trump care about a territory that is so far away?” I wondered loudly. Prompt came the reply as if I was foolish to ask this question. “He is gulping down Canada, and Greenland so what stops him from renaming things in India?” He had a point there. “That is the moment we fear. I want you to copyright our monopoly of renaming anything in India”

I smacked my head in frustration on his ignorance. “Copyright can be of design, formula or a book. Even colours of packaging. But not an action.” “But this our USP (Unique selling point)” he tried to show me he was a management graduate. “Given me some solution so that the hard earned USP or decades is not wiped out by this Trump fellow”. ‘So you want to stop him before he looks at India?” I asked knowing fully well his Trump Tower was planned in Mumbai so the man knows India exists which was reinforced by planeload of Indians he sent back by a military plane secretly photographing the terrain on the way.

“Use the strategy – If you can’t beat them, Join them” I announced the solution. He looked still dumb instead of embracing me for giving the solution. These politicians are really slow I thought to myself. ‘How?” he asked. This was the cue for me to explain my fees to pay in advance before I blurted out the solution. After he paid I told him, “Make Trump a honorary member of your party. Send him membership card with rules which demand unanimous voting for any renaming. If he tries, don’t let the renaming pass through.” I announced my trump (no pun) tactic. As the party did not have any such rule I also got assignment of making the rule book for them.

Trump created an opportunity of consulting income unknowingly miles away from Gulf of Mexico sorry Gulf of America.

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